I sometimes hear from wives who are trying very hard to understand the motivation of the other woman. They want to know who or what they are dealing with, of course. But many do not understand how someone would want to have a relationship with a man who is already committed AsianDate.com Reviews or already has a family. Who would want to be in a relationship that is so complicated and so hurtful. When there are so many other men out there, why chose one that is married? What could possibly be in it for her?
A wife might say: "I do not
understand what my husband's other woman is expecting to accomplish. She has
her own business and her own money. She is successful. She has never been
married and doesn't seem interested in getting married. So I don't know what
she would be looking to get out of this. What does the other woman typically
want?"
It certainly varies. In the same
way that people have different motivations in all relationships, so too does
the other woman. However, because I write articles about this, I do hear from
many people in many different AsianDate
situations. Below, I will go over some of the motivations that I commonly see.
The Attention And An Ego Boost: In
today's society, people seemed almost starved for attention. Many people base
their value on how many "likes" they get on Facebook or how popular
they are on Instagram. Our culture today seems to have the perception that if
you don't get a lot of attention, you are not worthy.
So many women in an affair are
drawn to the attention. It gives their ego a boost and they are thrilled to
know that they can get someone else's husband to pay attention to them. I know
that it's kind of sad. But in some cases it is true.
The Excitement Of Doing Something
That Isn't Right: People who are honest will often tell you that it wasn't
necessarily the sex in an affair that was the draw, it was the fact that the
sex was forbidden. AsianDate.com Some
people just like the thrill of knowing that they are doing something that is
frowned upon. It intensifies the experience.
A Relationship Without Attachments
Or Complications: Believe it or not, some women who have affairs with married
men do not want anything in return. Some of them are very clear that they never
want to be in a committed relationship. So they get involved with a married man
who is also clear on the fact that he has no intention of leaving his wife or
family. Neither of them want anything more than a relationship with no strings
attached. They feel that this keeps things less complicated.
The Continuation Of Being A Glutton
For Punishment: Some women have an uncanny knack for choosing emotionally
unavailable men. They may have low self esteem and are not doing this
consciously. They just seem to be a magnet for men who have no intention of
doing right by them. Sure, the men will take what the woman is offering, but
they never have any intention of truly standing by her. Because of her lack of
self esteem, she can repeat this process several times. She may or may not
finally wise up and learn to choose men who are available either literally or
emotionally.
A Lack Of Truth: Every once in a
while, I will hear from someone who swears that the man never told her that he
was married and she never figured it out until she was heavily invested in the
relationship. Many times, she never would have had anything to do with him if
she had known he was married. But once she finds out about the marriage, she
doesn't break it off because she believes that she has developed real feelings.
The Hope Of Something More: On the
other end of the spectrum is the other woman who knows with her head that this
man is married,but is hoping with her heart that he is going to grow to care
for her enough that she may eventually become the wife. These women like to
believe that they are special in some way - so special in fact that he is going
to throw everything away to be with her.
These are the women who will
continue to call and try to maintain contact even with the husband tries to
break it off and honestly tells her that he is going to work on his marriage
and stop cheating. These are the women who heard the husband say that he had no
intention of ending his marriage, but who thought that they could change his
mind after a little while.
As you can see, women have various
motivations and wishes when they have an affair. One size does not fit all. In
the case that this wife described, the other woman may fall into the category
of not wanting a permanent or serious relationship. She may be the type of
other woman who actually seeks out married men so that she can have a
relationship where nothing overly emotional or permanent takes place. This
feels more safe to her and she doesn't see herself as a threat to your
marriage. But obviously, she can't make that call for you. Because you know
that the existence of cheating is threat enough.
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